Monday....

Right now, I'm at work and I've hardly done any work-been too busy reading the blogs of the wonderful people out there in Blogland. It's interesting to see the things that other people go through that makes you think ' I know what you mean', or as I've found today, have been able to get some inspiration.

Today, my friend's new born bubby is having a heart op. He was born on Friday, and was transferred straight to Great Ormond Street hospital, where he's been ever since. I'm praying hard for the little mite's full speedy recovery. It's a hard time for my friend and her husband...and to some extent I know how they feel. My nephew had to have a heart operation when he was a few months old. But unlike little Yasin (that my friend's bubby), the doctors didn't operate straight away. They were aware of his heart condition, but when he had his check up, they told my sister that the problem had rectified itself-but of course that was not the case. He's 9 now, and fighting fit, though he has to have checkups often....but it's a very stressful and scary time, when the doctors are telling you the extend of the problem....I'll be praying for them.

I watched bits and pieces of 'The Last Days of Left Eye', that came on VH1 yesterday. I had read bits of this on other blogs & sites, but watching what I watched of it, I saw Lisa in a different light. I know people have said the same, but the wierdest thing is I can't explain it. It was nuts seeing the footage just before that fatal accident. I mean I'm watching it, thinking, shit in a couple minutes you're gonna be dead-and you don't even know it. And then when the car started going out of control and every one was like 'oh shit oh shit' but my body just went cold. I got the vibe though, that Lisa knew she was gonna die....I could be wrong, but that's what I got from the parts that I saw-I need to sit and watch it proper-whenever it comes back around...

The phones are blowing off the hook, and it's annoying the crap outta me-I know I'm at work and it's my job and all, but goodness-can't I get a minutes piece? Goodness!!!

I've decided to quit smoking-for real this time. This in in anticipation of July 1st, where it'll be illegal to smoke practically everywhere! It sucks, but I guess not getting a £50 fine is enough motivation to get me on track! I smoked my last 2 cigarettes this morning whilst stuck in traffic, and swiped another one from my friend at lunch time, and my chest is not happy right now! I guess I'm being reminded that I have asthma!! but from tomorrow I'm getting serious! I've got my little wall chart to monitor how I go each day-fingers crossed! The longest I've quit for was 3 months...but then my aunt died, and my god brother got stabbed, and I needed a coping mechanism-but this time I'm determined to get it right....no relapsing! I'm gonna be in some shitty moods bwoy!!!

It turns out that my friend's cousin who got killed last week was only trying to break up a fight. She wasn't involved in the beef at all-she was defending her pregnant friend or something like that. Fighting over man apparently. The girl that stabbed her is being charged with murder-was only 18 herself! So that's her life up the pisser too! I mean, what MAN is really worth you spending years in prison, what man is so important that you're gonna take someone else's live-cos lets be real, if you're coming to a fight with a knife you're intending to do some damage to someone -I lie?? Furthermore, what man is worth fighting over? Nah fuck that...if he's wanting someone else, 'mek 'im gwarn'! As it's said by the dancehall artist Spice ' me's a gal me nuh fight ova man!'...and that's the truth!! The girl's family are so broken by this (understandably), and it's hard to say whether they can take comfort in knowing that she died defending someone, breaking up a fight that had nothing to do with her and that she wasn't into the whole hype of beefing for stupidness!! From what I've read of the tributes from those that did know her, she was a sweet girl, who loved life, family & friends-she was always smiling, and was ambitious. She had her whole life ahead of her, and it's been cut short doing what she always did-look out for people. So right now, before I leave, I just wanna say Rest In Eternal Peace Sian Simpson. God needed another Angel, so be safe under God's wing, and watch over your family and friends.