The Bad News

So.....yeah, it really was really bad news. My LF's mum is dying. She's been ill for a for a really long time, and of late her illnesses have gotten worse, and right now it's at the stage now where the doctors reckon there's nothing more that they can do for her. They're apparently surprised that she's lived this long, but she's defied their predictions. I'm hoping and praying that she continues to do so.

Even typing this right now, it doesn't even seem real. I just wanna cry, I mean, surely this can't be happening. I've known this woman for so long, and it's like, what is losing your mum at 24/25? I can't really imagine what my LF is going through, but I know that what I'm feeling, and for her and her family I know it's 10x worse.

Since I've heard, I can think of nothing else, and I haven't been sleeping. This morning I'm absolutely knackered, cos I didn't sleep at all. It's hard to really put things down into words, I mean, it's almost like it's a bad dream that I can't wake up from.

And you know, when we met up on Saturday, SFAM was at the table with her face all pushed up-she's clearly still pissed at me, but you know when you think, seriously, in light of everything that's happening now, surely it's not the time to be focusing on you and you're hang ups?? But nope-as self absorbed as she is, she couldn't think of anyone other than she.

After the meeting, I met my family at Nando's. It was my brother's birthday, and he went to nandos and then on to bowling.

You know, everyone's trying to keep things normal, but it's so hard. The delivery of the news, just puts things into perspective. Let's you see what is, and what is not important. Family & friends are what's important, and stupid little arguments are just that. I'm not gonna focus on pettiness, and likewise I'm not gonna waste my time & energy on friendships that are no more. It's all about my LF and her fam, cos ultimately they're going through hell right now. Please, pray for them.....